Q: I would like my windows to take up the whole screen. I keep dragging my scrollbars around these tiny boxes and I can't help imagining the goddamn sales rep laughing to himself while he porks his girlfriend and smells the cool $700 he scammed off me.

A: There is a little box in the top window border near the right that was created for this unique function. Simply left click that and you will be reading this page in its full screened glory. -Terry

Q: I am experiencing thought-feedback. Is there a toggle somewhere to turn this off?

A: If you are experiencing nausea while looking at your monitor, it may be that the refresh rate is set incorrectly. Right click on the desktop and select "PROPERTIES", then select the "SETTINGS" tab, then the button labeled "ADVANCED". From here select the "MONITOR" tab, and select a different rate from the drop down menu. This rate can be found in your monitor's help manual or from a dealer's website. If either of those prove to be unavailable, you can simply flip through the various settings and see which you like best. -Terry

Q: I have trouble seeing the text.

A: If you mean what I think you do-- that is that the text on web pages is too small, then what you need to do is select "VIEW" from the window drop down menu, then select "TEXT SIZE", then select "INCREASE". You can repeat this process if the text is still too small. - Terry

Q: All my buttons are capitals. Where do I find the non-capitals?

A: Well computers today come with keyboards that actually function both as capital and lower case letters-- but you probably already knew that! The main key you're looking for is one marked "CAPS LOCK", "C. LOCK", or just "CAPS". It has a little light built into it, which is probably on. Just press that key once. That should put you pack into a more normal definition of typeface. - Terry